The Tale of Gears.

Posted by Kevin.....

Nonplussed does not begin to describe my befuddlement Sunday morning.

However, I will use nonplussed, as well a befuddlement, because it's so rare I have the opportunity to do so.

Not one to waste an opportunity (please see first sentence), I decided that while Stace and Henry were at church, I would sneak out for a quick mountain bike ride.

STOP! I know what you are going to say.

"Why aren't you at church with your family?"

Okay, actually I was pretty sure you were gonna ask me why I was riding when it is 8 degrees outside. Both valid points.

First, my relationship with the Methodist church is "I really, really like you. Can we just be friends?"

(Where as my relationship with the Catholic church is "Wow, I haven't seen you since my cousin's wedding. How are you? We should get together, over Easter perhaps......")

So it's no surprise that 24 seconds into my bike ride my rear wheel broke.Clearly I have offended the Lord. *

(*the vindictiveness of your God my vary.)

The chain turned the rear gears, but the gears spun freely on the wheel. Not only have I never seen such a catastrophic drive-train failure, but I was at a complete loss as to HOW this can even occur given my vast mechanical knowledge of all things Shimano.

"What matter of crapplication is this?" I said. Actually, I might be paraphrasing. But was this Karma* for not attending church with my family *(....if I were a Buddhist)

Or perhaps divine intervention to stop me from losing my fingers and toes.

Either way, it was definitely an opportunity. I was given a second chance to reexamine my priorities on that cold, lonely, dirt road Sunday morning.

And a very rare chance to use the word nonplussed (which I think we all agree is the penultimate misused word in English.)